Sarcastic Travels: Five Reasons Why You SHOULDN’T Visit New York!

So several months ago, I hopped on the bargain train and actually scored tickets to New York for the cheapest price ever. I think the time is right to write something about it on my blog. So there you have it. Listen to me and my Sarcastic Travels: New York style!

  1. Time Square is overrated.

Who wants to be surrounded by lights and tall buildings? Who wants to be overwhelmed and over joyed by something you only saw in the movies before you went to New York? Who wants to be impressed by this square that is typically New York? Who wants to be thankful that you can finally travel to New York and witness it with your own eyes? Pssh, not me.

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  1. Korean BBQ, dafcuk?

If there is one thing I hate the most, is the fact that I can eat well for a cheap price. Come on $40 for two persons and being absolutely super filled up that you actually want to crawl your way out of the restaurant? Eating superior quality of meat and tons of scrumptious side dishes that you can munch on? No thank you.

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Korean BBQ at Kang Ho Dong Baekjeong!

  1. The ability to afford luxury snacks such as lobster rolls

Heavenly lobster served with mayonnaise and spring onions in a nice toasted bun for $15? No way! I rather pay $50 for my lobster in Belgium where they literally just boil it for you and you have to do the rest of the cooking at home. Fcuk you and your delicious lobster rolls.

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  1. Magnolia bakery? More like MagNOWAYlia bakery

Perfect Caramel Pecan Cheesecakes that actually makes you want to cry and ask yourself if you are worthy to eat its sweet goodness. Nope nope nope. I don’t need that kind of food perfection in my life.

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  1. NY fashion sucks

Shop at stores such as Frankie Shop where I can buy one of a kind items? No way, I rather spend my money at H&M and Zara where I can buy the same clothing like everyone else and wear the goddamn items proudly as I mentally high five strangers who are wearing the same thing!

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Disclaimer: If you actually have not noticed, I was being sarcastic. New York was absolutely wonderful and the items I’ve just summed up are really things you should visit/eat!